HOW TO FORGET THE PAST FROM
CHILDHOOD ABUSE OR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Return To: Christian Healing
Living free of past abuse begins with a focus to forget the past. Making a conscious effort to do this will keep you in the present with the joy of looking forward to a fulfilling future. It will enable you to feel calm and to think with an astounding clarity about who you are and what great possibility belongs to you. The way I learned to do this was through God’s Word, the Bible.
Living in the moment sounds easy, but it will take some practice until you get into the habit. This is especially true if you haven’t yet dealt with your past abuse. It’s easy to get distracted by fears, worries, frustrations, and stress. But once you continue for a time, you’ll wonder how you could have lived any other way!
Before you continue, I want to warn that the following solutions will only be of limited value to you if you’re not separated from the people who have abused you as a child or young person. I learned this from experience. If you haven’t done this, chances are they’re still abusing you in some form, or you still see yourself as they regard you, which will be detrimental to the healing process and your ability to forget the past. You must separate yourself from your abusers for a radical and successful change.
Try these steps to Forget The Past that will help you live in the moment to gain present-moment thinking:
1. Meditate Upon The Word. The point of meditation of scripture is to live in the present moment with faith that God’s words will change your reality. The Bible calls it transformation in Romans 12:2. Practiced regularly, meditation in the Word will take you farther and father away from the pain of your past. To help quiet your mind, the best thing you can do is focus on your breathing and continue to release your thoughts with each breath you take.
2. Accept the past. You’ll feel better about yourself once you learn to accept past situations. There’s nothing you can do to change the past. Bringing the past into your present only clouds your present thinking and makes it harder for you to concentrate on the present moment. Thoughts of the past will still arise, but when you learn to accept them for what they are, you’ll be able to return to the present moment without regret or grief. Forgetting the past also means forgiving those who hurt you and forgiving yourself for anything you believe you’ve done wrong to others or yourself. Your recovery depends upon it!
3. Accept the future. On the other side of the coin, you also need to accept the future. You ultimately have no idea about what’s going to happen, and worrying about it won’t make an ounce of difference. How much time do you waste in a day by sitting around thinking about what you’re going to do to fix something? When you stop thinking, you have more time to actually do what is necessary! Christ tells us not to worry about tomorrow in Matthew 6:34 so we need to follow His teaching by faith. By following whatever Jesus teaches you’ll keep yourself from experiencing many of the unnecessary problems that can occur in life.
4. Be mindful. When you’re mindful, you pay close attention to what you’re doing in the present. You may think it’s just a mundane chore, but it’s important to do it with an open mind. Open up your senses to what you’re doing. You might be overwhelmed with positive feelings that you didn’t know existed. You do this by concentrating on one task without getting sidetracked with any other thoughts, including bad memories. Use this time to concentrate on making good memories. When you’re with family for example, think only of the time you’re spending with them and you’ll be creating a path to forget the past.
5. Get in touch with nature. Take some time to get in touch with nature. You can go for a walk or just sit under a tree. There aren’t many things that can open you up to the present moment like opening up to the vastness of nature.
Remember To Relax
As long as you maintain a relaxed attitude, you can achieve conscious living in the moment. Forgetting the past can be difficult as long as you continue to look at all the mistakes you’ve made or the abuse you suffered and live them over and over again. Use my list of healing scripture to believe that you are healed of whatever happened to you or whatever you’ve done wrong.
It may help to think of your true self and your brain as separate entities. Your brain can be thinking thoughts all over the place while the core of your being, your spirit, which is your “true self,” watches. When you maintain the wisdom to realize that your thoughts are out of control, your spirit, which is where you communicate with God, can pull you back into the present.
While you’re relaxing, pay attention to your breathing and try to take deep breaths. Remind yourself that, in this moment, the past and the future don’t matter at all. Truthfully all you have is the moment! The more time you can spend in the present, the better. Live in the here and now and enjoy a more fulfilling life! The farther away you are from your past, the more peace, joy and creativity you’ll experience.
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